tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15693384.post8187539299589611713..comments2024-01-31T07:54:13.816-08:00Comments on Diamonds in the Sky with Lucy: Shedding My Should's - or - the Albatross and the LizardKayce aka lucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01479940262271959482noreply@blogger.comBlogger14125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15693384.post-64825657976906852212011-04-13T15:06:10.700-07:002011-04-13T15:06:10.700-07:00Do you think 'should' exists when one live...Do you think 'should' exists when one lives in the Now?<br />Or what happens if instead I say 'I want to'...<br />Usually when I use 'should' it's not for me but to take care of someone else :-)))<br /><br />I'll have to think more about this, lucy. Thank you.claire bangasserhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12380558962103134334noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15693384.post-72141467867931555732011-04-10T19:28:00.806-07:002011-04-10T19:28:00.806-07:00deb - my shedding of should's comes from wiggl...deb - my shedding of should's comes from wiggling those thoughts around as i mentioned to ER and by having a resident life coach :)<br /><br />so, i have a question why "should" having a pedi/mani feel better than clean floors? and that perfection thing & embracing? here's my most recent helpful thought:<br /><br />as i let go of expectations, i am able to do everything "perfectly" in order to learn exactly what I need to learn todayKayce aka lucyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01479940262271959482noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15693384.post-57334164337297037122011-04-10T19:22:28.956-07:002011-04-10T19:22:28.956-07:00tenar - thank you again for sharing your lovely th...tenar - thank you again for sharing your lovely thoughts. the lizard is definitely quite adaptable. just when i think i have mine figured out, she slides a new angle in and i begin again.Kayce aka lucyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01479940262271959482noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15693384.post-49045028773843302762011-04-10T19:19:58.972-07:002011-04-10T19:19:58.972-07:00ER - great thoughts and wonderful to hear from you...ER - great thoughts and wonderful to hear from you. i'm amazed at how just wiggling a "should" around perhaps to a "can" "could" "will" makes it much more appealing. it feels like i have permission to do something differently rather than how everyone (whoever "they" are) expects me to.Kayce aka lucyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01479940262271959482noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15693384.post-41588203029615437552011-04-10T16:17:38.935-07:002011-04-10T16:17:38.935-07:00First of all, I struggle with the self-care should...First of all, I struggle with the self-care should. I SHOULD rest and relax more. Going to get a manicure and pedicure feels like a chore, when it should be a treat - because while I'm there, I'm not being productive (shouldn't I relax and enjoy being pampered instead of worry about unmopped floors?)<br /><br />Over the last year, I have shed a lot of my shoulds, but they still sneak up on me. Most of them circle around the need to be perfect.<br /><br />So share with us: how are you going to shed the should and embrace?Debhttp://peace-love-chocolate.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15693384.post-86450827622257367032011-04-10T08:23:16.780-07:002011-04-10T08:23:16.780-07:00First, that fantastic truth you shared - "who...First, that fantastic truth you shared - "wholly on the edge" Yes! Yes! thanks - Here, Asian, the heron, lovely. Answering your question, the albatross for me, not a SHOULD but a HOW = living long, how will I manage it?...but on the other side...I realize how incredibly brave my elders are, with very few interior roadblocks that I can see - it's all been sloughed, life has proved them, whittled them down to perfection - perhaps old-aging has its answers built in. Maybe all our worries do? BTW, the word for change in Chinese is the pictograph of a lizard, (because it changes its colors), a fine representation of the ability to adapt. And why is the most beautiful, graceful bird imaginable the image for us in the Western world of a worrisome obstacle? I know because of the "Rime of the Ancient Mariner," but still.Tenarnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15693384.post-47850887719911108732011-04-09T23:58:26.840-07:002011-04-09T23:58:26.840-07:00Lucy - I wonder if the 'shoulds' feel less...Lucy - I wonder if the 'shoulds' feel less like heavy baggage if they're turned into 'wills' (in management jargon 'actionable next steps'). That is not a vague aspiration, but a positive choice.<br />Of course, in moving to 'wills' we need to shed 'shoulds' as there won't be enough time, space, energy to action all of the 'shoulds' - prioritise ruthlessly, implement diligently.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15693384.post-37459630271470451582011-04-09T17:08:54.050-07:002011-04-09T17:08:54.050-07:00kel - fabulous exploration you've begun here o...kel - fabulous exploration you've begun here on shoulditis and shoulderitis - very interesting!!! let me know if you flush it out a little more :) enjoy the paddle and nap!!! xoKayce aka lucyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01479940262271959482noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15693384.post-47054943371419425132011-04-09T17:07:33.846-07:002011-04-09T17:07:33.846-07:00laura - i always love hearing ways people care for...laura - i always love hearing ways people care for themselves! btw - there's the same type korean spa in lynnwood too. i've been meaning to go for about 3 years now. hmmmmm.Kayce aka lucyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01479940262271959482noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15693384.post-38749744393716721982011-04-09T15:31:23.661-07:002011-04-09T15:31:23.661-07:00ps: the photos you chose to post with this, invite...ps: the photos you chose to post with this, invite a paddle followed by an afternoon nap, perhaps the perfect combination of refreshing and restful :)Kelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18425317942978557478noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15693384.post-8671367232408564152011-04-09T15:30:16.452-07:002011-04-09T15:30:16.452-07:00oh yes, those enormous handbags many women love to...oh yes, those enormous handbags many women love to carry are so very 'albatross'<br /><br />my favourite bag is a slim pouch that can be worn across the chest, with just enough room for wallet (yes, I use a man's wallet, much thinner, less bulky), phone and lipstick :)<br /><br />and what a coincidence that Tess used the word 'shoulditis', looks like shoulderitis - which might be what happens when one lugs an albatross around<br /><br />oh my...<br />i hurt my shoulder at work early in the year, and am still having trouble with it - yes - despite being sensible with my handbag - i have a severe case of shoulderitis<br /><br />hmmm, there is much to journal...<br /><br />starting with, not shouldering other people's responsibilities or expectations when they are unrealistic or disrespectful of my own rightsKelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18425317942978557478noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15693384.post-1068720823001428502011-04-09T14:46:19.241-07:002011-04-09T14:46:19.241-07:00Some friends and I were talking earlier about ways...Some friends and I were talking earlier about ways we take care of ourselves--some are creative (evidently there's a Korean spa in Tacoma where you can get a day pass, and it's free on your birthday) and some are simple (remove all ticking clocks from the vicinity if the ticking adds to your stress). I plan to think more on those things right now than on encumbrances. Maybe later for those... ;)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01298339544277607424noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15693384.post-49132987492894938922011-04-09T13:59:34.280-07:002011-04-09T13:59:34.280-07:00very interesting, tess. guess i should figure out...very interesting, tess. guess i should figure out my own enneagram one of these days :) while perfectionism has plagued me in the past, it seems to at least have loosened its hold on me. like i said, however, my lizard brain is very tricky!!Kayce aka lucyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01479940262271959482noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15693384.post-86570167526351688772011-04-09T13:19:37.006-07:002011-04-09T13:19:37.006-07:00Hmmm, although I think we all suffer from shouldit...Hmmm, although I think we all suffer from shoulditis, there are some Enneagram types for whom 'should' is a particular curse. It's often to do with perfectionism.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com